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Hey remember that asshole Christopher Columbus? You know the one in that jaunty rhyme they teach you in first grade: “In 1492, Columbus sailed the ocean blue.” They credit this guy with “discovering” America, challenging the world is flat theory, and spreading Christianity. But they overlook all the fun facts. You know like his opium addiction, shitting overboard his ship for cleanliness and my personal favorite, giving people STDs.
So when Columbus first decided to take his voyage to America he wasn’t going for any noble reason like in the name of discovery. He was actually trying to find a trade route by water to India. They wanted to avoid running into Middle Eastern people on land for silk and spice trade, the “Urapeeins” could continue smoking nutmeg while wearing silk shirts like this: